Reason #162 Not to Become a Crazy Old Cat Lady

Before I begin this post, please bow your head and say a prayer for me that the particular client I am about to write about is not part of the blogging world. I think I am safe, but if by some chance she were to come across my blog, I may be out of a big sale! And when I say big, I mean, it might pay my gas money this month.

My mortgage loan officer friend must not have read my post on how I am taking referrals for million dollar home buyers. While he did send me a referral, he dropped a zero off of that million. But hey, work is work, so I shouldn't complain, right? He called me up to tell me about a woman he just pre-approved to buy a house who needs a realtor. "Her name is "Frannie" and she is a 46-year old, single, never been married, first-time homebuyer, once in the military, woman with 3 cats who filed for bankruptcy two years ago...but she is very nice and ready to buy a very inexpensive house." Pretty much every Realtors dream. Naturally, he thought of me and thought we'd hit it off as a realtor/client duo.

Frannie and I met Saturday morning in the 103 degree heat to look at homes for her. Speculating on what my company must be like, I dressed down in my best casual, yet cool, clothes---a white cotton t-shirt and jean skirt. She showed up in a hospital scrub shirt and jeans and commented on how I was "all dressed up." In hindsight, I probably looked like the high school cheerleader and she looked like the cafeteria lady. However, my friend was right and Frannie was really quite sweet. We had a good afternoon driving around and actually found some things we have in common. Like how she was a cop in West Virginia in the military in the late 80s...and my dad was in the Navy in Hawaii in the 60s! We also both have a brother and ummmm....oh, and we both hate Ikea! AND, we both have noses on our faces! Let me just say, thank god she found a house she liked on our first outing. Not because we didn't get along, but because there are just not a lot of great houses in the price range she is looking. Last night we sat down to do some number crunching where she pulled out a piece of paper where she had listed her monthly expenses. It looked something like this:

Cable: $50
Electric: $25
Food: $200
Gas: $125
Car: $200
Insurance: $200
Cats: $150
Smokes: $100

She had various different mortgage payment scenarios and had determined what her monthly debt or surplus would be every month after considering her monthly bills. Basically, what was concluded was even if we get this house for considerably (and unrealistically) less than asking price, she will still be living paycheck to paycheck and have little to no money leftover for retirement/savings.

Let me say it here...The day I turn 46 and can't afford the least expensive home in Minneapolis because I am forking out $250 a month for cats and smokes...please kill me gently. So far, I'm in the clear, as I don't like cats and I have never smoked a cigarette in my life...but if it starts to happen, just let me go easy. I was this close to asking her if she has thought about the Patch...or how much she really loves her cats, but bit my tongue. To each their own.

As she explained to me, she will never have children and thus her cats ARE her kids. If that means living in an apartment for the rest of her life where she regularly hears gunshots (and not because she lives near a shooting range), just so she can afford her cats, so be it. Near tears, she said, "I'm scared. Buying a house means that I'm a grown-up and I don't want to grow up!" She tells this to me...her realtor...who's 20 years her junior and owns a home. But, I'm going to do the best I can to get Frannie and her "kids" into a safer neigborhood and a home she can own. Wish me luck...I've got some tough, tough negotiating ahead of me!